Archives for posts with tag: friends

Sometimes it’s nice to take some time out of your day to have a chat. To remind yourself that there are people in your life that are happy to listen and share.

Last night I had the pleasure of sitting down for a tea with a great friend of mine. I don’t get to see her nearly often enough, but the majority of my relationships are the same. My friends are wonderful and amazing people, that I barely ever get to see. This is my fault. I’m not the type of person that has friends that I see every few days, and am super close with. I used to have these, and somewhere along the way I was hurt a few too many times, and now my jaded past affects how I deal with the people in my life. In the past fews years I’ve ben yearning to change this.

Tea last night was lovely. To spend a few hours with a girlfriend chatting about the good, the bad and the ugly happening in our lives. It was refreshing, and comforting.

Making outside connections is important in order to stay grounded. People need people. People need to feel as though there are others that they can turn to, outside of their partner. Especially if you’re like me and not close with your family, there needs to be other relationships in your life.

So I’m trying harder to open myself up to being a better friend, even making new friends! It’s working so far, and I’m feeling more social over the past few months. I think it’s become a priority for me because I’m preparing to be a mother, and I feel like I’ll need a few life lines to keep me moving in the right direction.

Let yourself open back up. Even if time and time again you get hurt, it’s important to take the chance to open up again. Put yourself out there, take a chance, and grow.

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It’s days like today that remind me why my husband and I make such a good pair. Besides the fact that he is the only person that I’ve ever met that not only accepts, but actually participates in my extravagant weirdness, he also rivals my sense of humor like no other. Finding someone that gets your jokes, and makes you laugh in return, priceless. But the most important part of it all…. someone that you don’t want to kill half way through a renovation.

Today was a particularly tough day in our renos. We were tackling the floors in the master bedroom (we are laying laminate wood floors and have already completed the main living areas last weekend). The work was moving slowly. The cuts were rough and finicky. And we got about half the amount done that we had planned today. Yet at the end of it all, we are still happy to be working together and accomplishing something new. That’s how you know you’ve find the right one, making it through the rough reno days!

Greg also does something very important for me that no one else has ever been able to do… push me to achieve more. Whether it be a significant other, family member, or friend, I think everyone needs someone that makes them look at their goals in a new light. I certainly have that. Greg is incredibly supportive, almost to an annoyance. Sometimes you just want someone to say, “no, that’s a stupid idea”, because your idea is so audacious and scary that you’re not sure you should even indulge the thought. But luckily (or like I said, sometimes unluckily) I have someone who listens to my crazy ideas, thinks them through, and more often then not says “I think you can do”. Man alive! What an amazing thought. Someone who has more faith in you and your abilities than you have in yourself.

So needless to say I have very little excuses to not follow my dreams. He has loved me when I wasn’t working and wanted to devote myself full time to yoga. He has supported me when I’ve chosen to change majors… go back to school, again…. and even now as I take a much needed break from my continuous cycle of academia. So of course, not at all to my surprise, he’s seeing me through my next set of goals, and has even gone as far as to say he looks forward to reading these blog posts.

Why do you need someone like this? Because of that damn little voice again. We need someone to override that hairy little beast in our heads telling us that we’re crazy for dreaming big. The last thing we need in our lives are living breathing people uttering those same negative things. Most of the time the “friends” that talk you out of pursuing big goals, are the ones who are jealous of you for having the gumption to even state your goals out loud. 

We need to surround ourselves with people who encourage the pursuit of excellence while at the same time helping us identify a great idea from a terrible one (like the time I wanted to be a smoothie millionaire…. I’m a bit of a “head in the clouds” kinds of dreamer). Not all ideas are practical, safe or even logical, and having someone to point that out to you can keep you from investing your hard earned time and money in a complete and utter failure.

You must ask yourself, why wouldn’t you seek the companion of these types of people? Cut loose the friends that allow you to settle. Go out and find people who have the same thirst for life as you, or even more. If you surround yourself with dreamers who have the follow through to become achievers, it will begin to rub off, I promise. The most important part of these people in your life… they keep you accountable. Like I’ve said before, it’s really easy to tell you people you have goals and really hard to show people that you’re achieving them.

Find them, friend them, and do the same thing for them that you hope they will do for you. Push them harder, keep them accountable, and you will always have a forward moving partnership. A partner in crime.